Cruise 8th – 16th August

 I am at the Pullman Hotel in Paris again and greeting our Viking idi guests as they arrive. Immediately, I can notice which guests are going to be carefree and looking for a good time and then there are others, a minority. Who are just plain determined to be high maintenance.

Strange how that works. You spend all this time looking forward to a trip, planning it, paying hard earn money to have this trip of a lifetime and the glass is always half empty.

I think I have mentioned this before, but certainly it bears repeating. There is always a back story to everything. We can only know that which we see. And what we see is very superficial.  The reasons for behavior and demeanor are not always apparent.

I had just endured a very unhappy couple who moaned at me about everything from the weather, the traffic, the delay at passport control, the flight, the French and the fact that their room was not ready (at 9am in the morning).

What hotel can give you a room at that time of check-in? In Europe it is standard 2/3pm check in. Not 9:00am!!

I understood that they were tired and who knows how many connections, stresses and frustrations they had had on the way over to Europe.

That was my baseline of understanding, but I allowed for what I did not know. However, it was a tirade of negativity that was vocalized loudly and, frankly, rudely.

The guests were really unpleasant in their mood and it is never fun being on the receiving end of this type of disposition. But that’s my job. I am in the hospitality industry and the good comes with the not so good sometimes.

Dealing with difficult guests

A guest  approached me afterwards asked me how I kept my cool and was so nice to them. I smiled and said that I understand the stresses of travel can make it challenging for some.

In actual fact, there is more to it. I guess it is about suspending judgement and being empathetic – even when there is no obvious reason to feel such.

Every person comes with their own back story. Behavior is not always determined by the reasons given. There may be something far darker that initiates that type of attitude. It could be illness, family tragedy, marital problems….pretty much anything really.

I have been taught and learned the skill of tolerance by accepting that people are not necessarily mad at me, but mad at life. I may be in the firing line of those frustrations but I do not take it personally.

I, by no means, am suggesting I am some Ghandi and nothing gets under my skin. I am not that enlightened. But, certainly, I have improved vastly in my ability to suspend reaction, breathe and listen.

Lessons that teach

I remember the couple who had lost their daughter a short while prior to the trip and had come on the vacation to honor their daughter who had given them the trip as an anniversary gift.

It was heart breaking. However, no one was in the know and eventually the story was later shared late in the cruise by someone who had befriended them. Truth be told, the ONLY someone who had befriended them. On the face of it, these people were plain nasty. They were angry and disruptive.

The guests were in grief but no one could have known that fact. All we could see were two miserable travelers who hated life, being there and going through the motions.

Happily, they realized along the way that their grief was getting in the way of honoring their lost daughter’s gift, and they mellowed. However, lesson learned. Never judge. You do not know the back story.

This has taught me the biggest lesson in hospitality. Do not judge, just go with the flow and try and understand that which you do not know.

My ability to take abuse and unreasonableness has increased considerably since I was taught this by a very wise Cruise Director a long time ago. Thank you, Don! You know who you are 😊